Stress Management: Put the “I” Back in your “Life”
Stress is good. We don’t often hear that, but it is true. A certain amount of stress, called ‘eustress’, can motivate us and keep us moving forward toward a goal. The problem is when stress (distress) becomes chronic or debilitating. Stress will never be gone from our lives, but it can be managed. Reducing your stress with proven strategies is possible.
The stress hormone, cortisol, changes our body’s activities to prepare for fight or flight, which is helpful in times of danger. Unfortunately, in our modern society fighting or fleeing are not acceptable reactions to our modern day situations and so cortisol levels remain high.
These elevated cortisol levels can interfere with learning and memory, lower immune function and bone density, affect mental health, and increase weight gain, blood pressure, cholesterol, heart disease and much more. The bottom line is that our life expectancy is shortened when stress is a constant in our lives.
The source of stress can either be external from the situations you find ourselves in, or internal from the way you interpret those situations. I explore this in my book Wellness is More Than Weight: Easy Steps to Change Your Health Habits and Your Life, but here are a few hints for now.
External Stress: Control/Can’t Control
One helpful activity to manage external stress is to make a list of the situations you can control and those we can’t control. Trying to fight a battle that is not winnable is decidedly distressing. Being able to focus on what can be avoided or ameliorated and letting go of the rest gives a sense of control.
Internal Stress:
When it comes to managing internal interpretations that cause us stress, the article “Stress Management: Using Self-Help Techniques for Dealing with Stress” https://www.helpguide.org/mental-health/stress/stress-management offers several “A’s” for improving or avoiding what makes us anxious:
Adapt to the stressor
If you can’t change the stressor, change yourself, your internal environment. You can adapt to stressful situations and regain your sense of control by changing your expectations and attitude.
Reframe problems. Try to view stressful situations from a more positive perspective. Rather than fuming about a traffic jam, look at it as an opportunity to pause and regroup, listen to your favorite radio station, or enjoy some alone time.
Look at the big picture. Take perspective of the stressful situation. Ask yourself how important it will be in the long run. Will it matter in a month? A year? Is it really worth getting upset over? If the answer is no, focus your time and energy elsewhere.
Adjust your standards
Perfectionism is a major source of avoidable stress. Stop setting yourself up for failure by demanding perfection. Set reasonable standards for yourself and others, and learn to be okay with “good enough.”
Focus on the positive. When stress is getting you down, take a moment to reflect on all the things you appreciate in your life, including your own positive qualities and gifts. This simple strategy can help you keep things in perspective.
Adjust Your Attitude
How you think can have a profound effect on your emotional and physical well-being. Each time you think a negative thought about yourself, your body reacts as if it were in the throes of a tension-filled situation. If you see good things about yourself, you are more likely to feel good; the reverse is also true. Eliminate words such as “always,” “never,” “should,” and “must.” These are telltale marks of self-defeating thoughts.
Conclusion
Hopefully these ideas will give you a way to ‘think’ your way out of stressful situations. Using the “A’s” might just help you find your “I”.